Every January I write a post dissing resolutions and advocating setting goals for the new year. If you want to read more about why I think resolutions prewire us to fail, check out last years post.
Here’s the abbreviated version. Goals offer an opportunity to approach success in realistic increments, not just in steps forward but those inevitable steps back. With a goal in sight, tiny reversals don’t have to mean failure. In fact, those blips on our path often represent lessons learned.
Now, compare resolutions. Resolutions are nearly always all or nothing, no compromise allowed, no second chances to get it right, and worst of all, offer no opportunity to learn from our mistakes.
Today I will—somewhat bravely, if you ask me—examine the goals I set forward last January to see where I triumphed, where I failed, and where I could have done better.
Below (in bold) are the goals exactly as they appeared in my very first blog post of 2014. Comments and lessons learned follow each goal.
1. Complete CRYING FOR MERCY.
I didn’t complete the manuscript. I’m at 70k words and still writing. Because I took time off from the novel to write two shorts for anthologies, CRYING FOR MERCY took a back seat for part of the year. It was a worthwhile tradeoff.
LESSON: Be flexible. Goals can morph as circumstances change, whereas resolutions tend to be immutable.
2. Self-publish BLOOD UNDER WILL.
This didn’t happen either, but it was a conscious choice. BLOOD UNDER WILL is a prequel to my novel A TWIST OF HATE. Originally, A TWIST OF HATE was scheduled for publication in October of 2014 but due to contract negotiations, the date was pushed to June 2015. As a result, I decided to hold off on BLOOD UNDER WILL until spring 2015.
LESSON: Sometimes goals set on January 1 may not make sense when forces beyond our control intercede. Don’t stick to a goal if it’s no longer sound.
3. Find more time to read. Reading is essential to becoming a better writer. I read fifty books last year. My goal for 2014 is to double that number.
This was a resolution cloaked as a goal, and I’m embarrassed I immortalized it in a public blog post. In reality, I read sixty-five books in 2014, a 30% increase—not bad VR!
LESSON: Ground your goals in what is possible. I used to read a hundred+ books a year, but now, by necessity, I spend more time in front for the keyboard than with my nose in a novel.
4. Give more – in all ways.
While I had less to give monetarily, I found myself volunteering more. I’m still learning how to support a cause without throwing money at it. Time and effort are as important, if not more important, than dollars. I’m keeping this one on my list for 2015.
LESSON: Be creative when choosing a path to reach your goals.
5. Guard against regret. It’s been seeping into my thoughts lately, and there’s nothing more crippling.
I could have done better with this one. Regret is destructive—no question, and it’s difficult to escape entirely. As with #4, I’m keeping this on my 2015 list.
LESSON: Reaching a goal may be more difficult than anticipated. Don’t beat yourself up. Take pride in any forward movement even if you’re not there yet. Allow your goals to buoy your confidence not sink it.
Now that I have a head start, time to frame my goals for 2015!
How did you do with your 2014 goals?
Are you prepped and ready for 2015?
Pat Hatt said:
Being creative to reach goals is a good way to reach them indeed. And yeah the cat disses resolutions too haha
VR Barkowski said:
I have the obstinacy of a cat. Tell me not to do something, and I’m on it. That’s the real reason resolutions don’t work for me. 🙂
Southpaw HR Sinclair said:
I did get with my goal…’cause I didn’t set any, but that created its own set of problems. 😉 I love goal #5 That’s one I will work on this year.
VR Barkowski said:
#5 is a big one, Holly. My regrets are different than last year, so maybe that’s a sign of progress??? 🙂
Polly Iyer said:
I’m never disappointed in reaching the goals I set, because I don’t set any. I don’t intend to set any this year either.
VR Barkowski said:
Built in success. Love it, Polly!
rxena77 said:
Flexibility keeps you going forward when events get in the way, right? 🙂 I have shifted from goals to establishing a life-style.
Make no sugar a habit and your body thanks you. Make reading a new book a part of each day helps take the focus off numbers and on learning a little something new daily.
My latest: A SHORT HISTORY OF NEARLY EVERYTHING lets me know how much of what we think we know is like an atom, full of empty spaces!!
Let no day pass without writing at least one new sentence on your latest book — it usually stretches into at least a paragraph! 🙂 Write at least a page a day, and in a year you have written a whole novel!
Best of fortune with your goals and the release of your new book!!
VR Barkowski said:
Great advice, Roland. Habit is an amazing thing. Once behavior becomes habit rather than conscious decision, we no longer register the “negative” aspects. I do write everyday, but unfortunately if I stop to write a short story, I can’t work on my manuscript. My brain won’t allow it.
Anonymous said:
I don’t do resolutions. I think they are silly because people are very unrealistic about them. I like goals, though. I create writing-related goals every year but make sure they are within my limits.
Happy New Year!
VR Barkowski said:
Goals work for me, even though I don’t necessarily meet them all. It helps to see where I’m going and when I’m veering off the path. Mostly the latter. 🙂
susan swiderski said:
Goals are definitely the way to go. Most of the resolutions people claim to make in honor of a new year are nothing but hot air. They’re filled with promises unkept, intentions unrealized, and goals set far too high. It’s better to take a realistic look at oneself and set reasonable and attainable goals, but like you said, we have to be flexible, too. Me? I’m still breathing. So far, so good.
VR Barkowski said:
Breathing is good! That’s going at the top of my 2015 goal list, Susan.
Carol Kilgore said:
Great goals! I also love the cartoon.
VR Barkowski said:
Isn’t the cartoon cute? I especially liked the driving to the gym line that says nothing about getting out of the car. 🙂
Liz A. said:
I totally agree with you about resolutions. Which is why I don’t make them. But I also don’t set goals in January. I feel like you shouldn’t have to wait until January. I prefer to set new goals as new opportunities arise and not be chained to a calendar. But that’s just how I see it.
VR Barkowski said:
Excellent point, Liz. I’m big on goals, too, and set them whenever possible. I’ve always worked better under pressure, and sometimes it’s necessary to apply my own. 🙂
emaginette said:
My only rule to goal setting is break them down into attainable bites. I’ve succeed ever since. 🙂
Anna from Shout with Emaginette
VR Barkowski said:
Awesome tip, Anna. Much less intimidating (and confidence-building) to frame realistic, attainable goals.